


Maybe I Wasn't Good Enough

by daddyoshie



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: 2018 Stanley Cup Playoffs, Angst, Established Relationship, Feelings, Fluff and Angst, Jealousy, Kinda, M/M, Sex, Soulmates, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings, Washington Capitals, everything i write reads like a melodrama and this is no different, listen this is just pure sugar and sap, lots and lots of feelings, or at least the leadup
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-09
Updated: 2018-07-09
Packaged: 2019-06-07 16:17:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,992
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15222953
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daddyoshie/pseuds/daddyoshie
Summary: Karl knew that he and John would grow apart. It was only natural. But seeing John work like that with someone else, seeing John smile like that with someone else … it brought a nasty feeling into Karl’s gut.So, the day after he watched them advance, Karl made a number of rash decisions all at once, and he called John.





	Maybe I Wasn't Good Enough

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much to AetherSeer for the beta!! And I hope you guys enjoy sap, 'cause that's what this story is and I'm proud of it. Also, I know zero French, so I'm hoping Google Translate provided me with accurate French, and I'm sorry if it didn't.

Karl knew that he and John would grow apart.

It was only natural, what with him being in Montreal and John still in Washington. Still, it was difficult. It was the first time in a decade they hadn’t played on a team together, and it felt weird without John by his side. Empty. Lonely. And it sucked. Karl wasn’t performing as well as he could have, and he had trouble clicking with the team. The team struggled, Karl struggled, and it was frustrating all around.

But the worst part, in Karl’s opinion, was checking in and seeing how fantastic John was doing. John was having the year of his life. He was playing better than he’d ever played before, and he was outscoring every other defenseman in the league. He was completely robbed of an All-Star nod, in Karl’s humble opinion. It made Karl incredibly happy to see John do so well, but the thought of John finally having his breakthrough year once Karl was away and wasn’t his partner anymore … well, Karl didn’t like that thought so much.

It wasn’t so bad at first. He wouldn’t feel so bad if it was just John alone, and the partner was a non-factor. And at first, it was. The first half of the season he was paired with Christian Djoos, whom Karl remembered from a couple of training camps. The kid was young, and John looked to have taken him under his wing. He was doing good, but not nearly at John’s level.

And then the Caps made a trade, and John got a new partner: Michal Kempny. Karl knew practically nothing about him. Maybe he’d played against him once? Regardless, from what Karl saw in the highlights, John and Kempny had clicked almost immediately. And Karl did not like that. Seeing John work like that with someone else, seeing John smile like that with someone else … it brought a nasty feeling into Karl’s gut. Watching them pass to each other and then embrace in the goal hug was like a punch to the face.

He was afraid he was losing John.

Sure, they weren’t on the same team anymore. But they’d been attached at the hip for a decade. And what they had was … special. Karl would never meet another person like John, and he’d never know another person as completely. They’d never really had a discussion about what they were. They never were anything official. They just … were. Spending all their time at each other’s houses, grabbing each other’s coats and knowing each other’s orders at all the major chains, instantly knowing what the other was feeling or what the other might need at any given moment.

Over the years, that had led to holding hands, occasionally sharing a hotel bed, a kiss on the forehead, and then on the lips, and then some more … intimate liaisons. They never needed to talk about what they were. It wasn’t official. It was just the two of them together. Until they weren’t.

But that sort of bond just doesn’t go away, even with five hundred miles between them. However, phone calls and Skypes had trickled down from multiple times a week to just every so often. Even texting slowed down at an alarming rate. It was natural to grow apart, but ultimately, Karl knew the distance couldn’t sever that bond.

However, someone else getting in the middle? That had the potential to drive them apart, and it terrified him.

So, the day after he watched Kuzy score in overtime to defeat the Penguins, Karl made a number of rash decisions all at once, and he called John.

“Hey, Alzy, what’s up?”

_God,_ it was good to hear John’s voice again. They hadn’t talked in awhile, not for a few months, at least. Not since before the trade deadline. Hearing the drawl of his voice was like walking into a kitchen filled with the smell of baking cookies. Warm, comfortable. Home. Karl closed his eyes and prepared to breathe in the scent that was so undeniably John before he remembered that John wasn’t actually here. Months now and he still wasn’t used to it.

“Hey man, congrats on the win last night, that’s fucking incredible,” Karl said, letting pride and glee leak into his voice.

“Thanks, man.” Even though they couldn’t see each other, Karl just knew that John had that stupid little grin on that face of his. “We finally fucking beat those guys.”

“I bet Kuzy can get a free drink anywhere he wants in town.”

“Alzy, you know that Kuz doesn’t really drink.”

“Fine, mozzarella sticks, then,” Karl said with a wry grin.

“How about an order of _wings_ ?” Dead silence. “‘Cause, you know, he’s a _bird_.”

Karl shook his head. “God, you’re an idiot.”

John giggled. The most musical, dumb laugh, and one of Karl’s favorite sounds in the world. And it just made him more determined to do what he was about to do.

“Hey, Carly, I’ve got something I want to tell you,” Karl said, intention clear in his voice.

“What is it?”

“Well, I really miss you guys,” Karl started, being sure to keep his composure, “and clearly, I’m not playing any hockey right now. So, I decided I’m gonna come down to D.C. to watch you guys in the playoffs.”

“Really?” Karl could hear John’s excitement.

“Yeah, really. You guys are doing amazing, I wanna see you.” Of course he wanted to see all of his old teammates, but he didn’t mention that he was aching to see one of them in particular. That it was killing him to not be with him right now.

“Wait, you know what we can do?” John asked, an idea forming in his brain. “We can get you into the family suite.”

Karl’s heart pounded. “Wait, really? You can do that?”

“Yeah, of course. We got Latts in there earlier this year, we can get you in. I’ll just say that you’re a special guest of mine.”

Karl tried to calm his heart rate and convince himself that those words didn’t mean anything. John would probably do the same for Greenie or Mojo or any of their old teammates. He couldn’t take them to heart.

“Dude, that would be awesome. It’ll be great to see all the gals and kids again. And, you know, eat some free food.”

“You gonna come visit the guys, too?” John asked. Karl’s mind might have been tricking him, but he thought he heard an edge of expectancy in John’s voice.

“Of course, who do you think I am?” Karl responded. “When do you guys have time?”

“Actually, most of the guys are going out to dinner the night between games three and four. It would be awesome if you could come with us.”

It was almost too perfect. “Yeah, that would be great. I really wanna catch up with you guys. And you gotta introduce me to all the new guys. You know, everyone I didn’t meet back in October when I came by.”

“You got it, Alzy. You gotta meet Kemper, that guy is great, you’re gonna love him.”

Karl had to keep the utter backstabbing pain out of his voice. “Can’t wait to meet him.”

* * *

 Karl landed in Washington just hours before he was supposed to meet the guys for dinner. He didn’t want to leave any extra time in his day for sitting around and getting in his own head. He got a cab from the airport, dumped his stuff in his hotel room, and got himself ready as quickly as possible. Before he knew it, he was on his way to the restaurant, his foot nervously tapping away.

He had no idea what sort of reaction he was going to get. How would the guys receive him? How would _John_ treat him?

The second he stepped through the doors, he heard the guys shouting at him from all the way across the restaurant.

“ALZY!”

“Holy shit, it’s Alzy!”

“Alzy! Back here, Alzy, we missed you!”

Turns out he didn’t have anything to worry about from the guys; they were the same overbearing and loving brothers. Tom greeted him with a big bear hug, Andre kissed him on the cheek, and Beags slapped him on the ass. They brought him right into the fold of the conversation, like he’d never left at all.

And then John walked in, and Karl couldn’t focus on anything else.

Once John saw Karl, his face split into a grin, and he practically ran to embrace Karl. He held him tight, his hands clutching at Karl’s back, and his face buried in Karl’s neck. Karl held John right back, never wanting to let him go.

“It’s so good to see you, Alzy!” John exclaimed, practically giggling.

“You too, Carly.”

“I missed you.” John’s voice dropped down to a whisper.

“Me too,” Karl whispered back.

John lifted his head to look at Karl, his face just inches away. Karl found himself lost in those blue eyes, the ones so distant and so present at the same time. He remembered the way those eyes used to look at him every day, and the way they made him feel like he was the only person in the world.

“GET A ROOM!” Nisky shouted, eliciting laughter from the rest of the group.

Karl, blushing, pulled away and resolved to act like a normal human. It took all of his willpower, but he took his hands off John.

“Enjoying your time in Montreal, Alzy?” John asked, taking charge of the conversation before Karl had the chance. “You learned any French yet?”

Karl groaned. “You know I’ve always been bad at French. I’ve picked up a few things here and there, but really only the words related to hockey.”

“Really? What a shame. ‘Cause I was just gonna tell you that _tu es mon tout, mon âme soeur_.”

“I know that was probably an insult, so right back at you. And your face is ugly too.”

John just smiled.

“Anyway, how’s it been, man?” Karl asked, changing the subject. “From the looks of it, things have been pretty swell with you guys.”

John beamed. “Aw man, I really wish you could be with us for this, Alzy. Everything’s been clicking, we’ve had so much fun … we beat the fucking _Penguins_ , man!”

He shouted this last part, and the rest of the team cheered. Some punches were given to Kuzy’s shoulder, who was tucked in a booth next to Dima (who was, of course, the biggest inciter of said punches).

“No, but everything’s been awesome,” John said, turning his attention back to Karl. “The whole city’s into it like I’ve never seen before. People will recognize you and shout ‘Let’s go Caps!’ and wish you luck. And everyone’s rocking the red. It’s unbelievable.”

“That sounds so cool, man,” Karl said, the look of sheer joy on John’s face warming his heart. “I bet you’re getting free stuff everywhere.”

John chuckled. “I can’t remember the last time I paid for Dunkin’ Donuts.”

“You betraying Starbucks with another brand of coffee? John, I’m shocked.”

“Just the donuts, Alzy, let’s not get too crazy.”

For a moment, they were both smiling and laughing, and it was just like it was a year ago. Two souls coming together as one, two people completely in tune and enamored with each other. For a moment, it seemed like they hadn’t missed a beat, and for this moment in time, at least, they would pick up right where they left off.

Then John spotted someone behind Karl. “Hey, Kemper!”

And that moment was broken.

John went to approach the man who had just entered the restaurant, quickly bringing him up to the group with his arm thrown around his shoulder. Karl swallowed a lump in his throat.

“Hey, Alzy, this is Kemper. Michal Kempny. You’re gonna love this guy, he’s fucking great.”

The first thing that struck Karl about Michal Kempny was how absolutely fucking gorgeous he was. It was like someone had googled “world’s sexiest, chiseled, well-defined hunk” and had made him into a person. His jawline was defined, his playoff beard was perfect for his face, and that shy little smile he currently had just tied everything together. Karl could never have hair perfectly fluffy like that. Hell, he could never have a beard like that, either. Kempny was younger than Karl, and certainly more stunningly handsome than Karl. Karl suddenly felt uncomfortable, and he had sudden urges to both stand up straighter and curl into himself. _Wow_ , this guy was good-looking. Karl stupidly hoped that this guy would be an asshole so that he could find a legitimate reason not to like him.

Karl held out his hand. “It’s nice to meet you.”

Kempny took his hand and shook it firmly. “Very nice to meet you, too. Carly tell me all about you.” He spoke with a thick Czech accent and in a higher voice than Karl would have expected. But he spoke with a smile, and looked at Karl with bright eyes that charmed him despite his best efforts.

“Oh, really? He’s been telling you stories about me? None flattering, I’ll bet.”

“He tell me all about best friend who went away. And I know I have huge shoes to fill as new partner.”

The chances of Kempny meaning anything by it were low, but something about the words “new partner” didn’t sit well with Karl.

“Has he been a good teammate? Showing you the ropes?”

“So helpful, he’s unbelievable,” Kempny said. “V has helped me off ice mostly, but Carly unbelievable partner. He help me improve my game, we skate well together … I don’t know where I’d be without him.”

Kempny looked at John, smiling, and the alarm bells went off.

John brushed Kempny off. “You’re just saying that. And you’re not giving yourself enough credit. You would not _believe_ this guy’s breakout passes and his puck ability. And his _speed_ , my god, it blew me away.”

And then John looked back at Kempny, and Karl’s heart dropped into his stomach. That dumb, stupid smile he’d seen John direct at him so many times was now beaming at Kempny. And Kempny, well … Karl knew that look. The fond smile, the big, bright, starstruck eyes … Karl would recognize his own expression anywhere.

Someone a few tables away started shouting in Czech, and Kempny looked over and shouted back. “Sorry, V call a very important ‘Czech Mafia’ meeting, and I must go,” he said, surrounding “Czech Mafia” with air quotes. “It was very nice to meet you,” he said, shaking Karl’s hand one more time before joining the other table.

“What a guy, huh?” John asked. “Frankly, I think he saved us.”

Karl just nodded in agreement.

The rest of the meal passed in a watery blur. He had a great time catching up with all of the guys, but he felt like he wasn’t entirely there. Even though he was at John’s side the whole night, he kept looking at him in his peripheral and feeling like he was getting further and further away. Every so often John would say something to Kempny, Kempny would look at him with a big smile, and Karl felt like he was getting stabbed in the gut. From what it looked like, he had already lost John.

As the night wore on, people trickled out until there were just a few of them left. Karl was getting ready to call for a cab to bring him back to the hotel, but John stopped him.

“Why don’t we head back to my place? We can hang out a little longer, just the two of us,” John offered, pointedly looking Karl in the eye.

Karl, frustrated with John and his own feelings for him, wanted to storm off or at least come up with some excuse for why he had to leave. But he couldn’t resist that look John was giving him. He never could.

“Sure, sounds great,” he said, trying his best to make his voice sound casual.

“Have _fun_ , you two,” Beags said, waggling his eyebrows at them.

John was in a chatty mood, so Karl was more than happy to let him do all the talking during the car ride. He went on and on about their postseason run and about all the shenanigans the guys had gotten into since the last time they’d talked. Karl just let that sweet mouth run. He couldn’t think of anything to say to him right now. All he wanted to do was confront John, ask him what had happened between them, and ask John why he wasn’t enough for him. He kept his mouth shut for now, but he wasn’t sure he’d be able to put up a happy facade once they got inside.

They were at John’s house much too soon. Karl followed John inside, watching as John flipped on all the lights and led Karl into the living room. John flopped down onto the couch, stretching his arm along the top and crossing his legs. “Sit down and relax, Alzy. I’d tell you to take off your shoes but I know your thing about bedbugs; you can keep them on or toss them on top of my bookshelf, if you want. You wanna watch some TV? I’m pretty sure there’s some late-night baseball on, or we can throw on the food network. How’s that sound?”

Karl couldn’t take it anymore. He couldn’t just sit there next to John and pretend he was feeling okay. Like this situation was just _fine_. After a whole evening of keeping his feelings to himself, he took a deep breath and let loose.

“What’s going on with you and Kempny?” he blurted out, his stomach absolutely roiling.

“What?” John asked in confusion, sitting forward on the couch. “Nothing’s going on, why would you think something was going on?”

“Don’t act dumb with me, John,” Karl snapped. “I was there the whole time at the restaurant, I saw the way you two looked at each other. And talked about each other. You’re ‘partners,’ after all.”

John looked completely flabbergasted. “Hold on a moment. You honestly thought Kemper and I were in some kind of relationship?”

“Yeah, of course.”

John sighed. “You’re a fucking idiot.”

Karl started. “Excuse me?”

John rose from the couch and took a few steps closer. “Karl, that would never happen. We’re just friends and teammates. I love the guy, but in the same way I love Nicky or Holts. Nothing more.”

Karl still rolled his eyes. “Oh, please. Don’t act like you didn’t see the heart eyes on his face.”

“That’s just d-partner love. We have a lot of those on this team.”

“John, you _know_ that is just sexual tension. Acting like every single bit of linemate or d-partner chemistry on this team isn’t just the desire to fuck is ridiculous.”

“Well that’s not true.”

“Oh yeah? Name me one.”

“Well, there’s Ovi and Nicky —”

Karl burst into laughter. “That’s a good one, John. I have _walked in_ on that before. Try again.”

“Tom and Andre.”

“One: they’re not lineys. Two: don’t act like that hasn’t happened.”

“Alright …” John snapped his fingers. “Nisky and Snarls.”

Karl tried to rack his brain to put up an argument, but he couldn’t find anything. He huffed. “Alright, fine. Not everyone. I don’t think. But then there’s you and me, John.” His voice softened to an unexpected hush.

John noticed the change in Karl’s tone and took a few steps closer. “Wait, Karl, are you … jealous of me and Kemper?”

Karl crossed his arms over his chest and looked away. “I never said that.”

Taking big strides, John closed the distance between the two of them and gently placed his hand on Karl’s arm. “Karl.”

Karl couldn’t resist the pull of John’s eyes. He looked into those pools of blue, and all of his walls broke down. He dropped his arms, and it took all his strength not to let himself melt into John right there and then.

“Of course I’m jealous, John,” he said. “I’m not here anymore. And now you’re having the best year of your life with this other guy, who seems to complement you perfectly. Someone young, hot, gorgeous, fast, good with the puck, and seemingly superior to me in every single way—”

“I’m sorry, what did you just say about yourself?” John interrupted.

Karl was taken aback. “I, uh … that he’s better than me. On the ice, and definitely better-looking than me, and possibly more pleasant than me.”

“Karl.” John took one of Karl’s hands in his own. “ _Never_ say that about yourself, okay? Never. He’s not better than you or even better-looking than you, that’s not what this is about.”

“Maybe I just suck, then. ‘Cause the second I leave, you just take off. You play out of your goddamn mind, and you do it without me. And with somebody else. And it kind of hurts, John, to watch you. Maybe I wasn’t good enough. Maybe I was never going to be good enough for you.”

John stared for a moment, mouth agape. “Karl … is that really what you think? Because I want you to know that absolutely none of that is true.” He took Karl’s other hand, holding both hands in a firm grip. “Karl … this last year of my life has kinda fucking _sucked_ without you. I know the team is technically doing better, but who knows the reason for that. It certainly wasn’t because of how we feel about you. And definitely not because of how _I_ feel about you.

“You mean _so much_ to me, and it’s absolutely killing me that I can’t see you and be with you every day. No one knows me as well as you do. You’re my best friend and my partner. I don’t know anyone else as funny, as kind-hearted, as charmingly grumpy, as competitive, and definitely no one as superstitious. There’s no one else I’d rather go about my day and share life with.”

John paused and took a deep breath. “Never say that you’re not enough. For yourself, or for me. Never in my life have I _ever_ thought that you weren’t enough for me. Sometimes _I_ would think I wasn’t enough for _you_.”

“You? Really?”

“Yes, really.” John smiled. “So please don’t ever think that, it breaks my heart to hear you thinking of yourself that way. I finally see you again after months and you come in with all this silly talk about me and Kemper and you somehow not being good enough. It’s like you’re blind, you’re an idiot.”

“Excuse me? Blind? Did I miss something?”

“There you go again, like I haven’t been bending over backwards to keep your attention. You know … my feelings haven’t changed one bit, Alzy. Not a bit.”

Karl’s heart almost stopped. “I … what?”

“Did you not see it? I’ve been trying to attract you.”

Now that he mentioned it, John was wearing a very low-cut shirt, his nice shoes, and a very sweet-smelling cologne. The sort of getup that would’ve had Karl all over him in an instant.

“You were?”

“Of course I was. And I thought it might have been working, too. I literally invited you back to my house. Do you see anyone else here? What did you think was gonna happen? I wanted to seduce you, make out with you, and fuck you.”

Karl was struck by the candor. John had never been so open about all this before. Frankly, Karl really couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He could barely string together a sentence. “John, I … are you sure you feel the same? It’s been a long time.”

John sighed. “You really don’t understand a lick of French, do you?”

Karl shook his head carefully. “Uh, no, I do not.”

“Well, if you did understand …” John gently wrapped an arm around Karl’s waist, pulling him close, chest to chest, so that John could practically whisper in his ear, “you’d know that at dinner, what I said was that ‘you’re my everything, my soulmate.’”

Never in his wildest dreams did Karl ever believe that John would say something as romantic as that to him, yet it was coming out of John’s mouth. “Soulmate?” he whispered.

“Yes, soulmate,” John said. “There’s no one else I want to be with. It’s always been you. I know it’s been weird these last few months, and I haven’t been communicating all that well. And I know we’ve never really used labels or really affirmed anything with ourselves, but … I think it might be time. We’ve never really needed words, and we never said this to each other, but I know we both felt it … and I want you to hear it, because I’ve never felt anything more deeply in my life. I love you.”

For a moment, the entire world skidded to a halt. Karl stood frozen to the spot, unable to do anything but stare into John’s eyes, mouth agape. Part of him was convinced he was in a dream, one that he was deathly afraid he was going to wake up from.

John’s arms were wrapped around him, their chests were pressed close together, touching in as many places as possible, their faces just inches apart. Karl could feel John’s breath on his neck, threatening to make his whole body collapse. Karl was hyper-aware of the closeness, of every little thing John was doing with his body. His brain was also processing the fact that the man that he loved, and had always loved, had just told him he loved him.

Somewhere, deep down, a part of him knew and had always known. But hearing John say those words, hearing “I love you” out loud—it changed everything. Something clicked, and Karl knew that things weren’t going to be the same after this. But it didn’t mean his heart didn’t pound like a drum in his ears, and it didn’t mean he didn’t quake in his boots, blushing like a teenager.

It felt like forever, but it had only been a few seconds. Karl didn’t have the control over words that John did, and he couldn’t compete with the monologue and declaration of love, so he just went for plain and simple.

“I love you, too.”

And if the tension in the air and the lack of proximity between them wasn’t going to do it before, the smile on John’s face certainly did.

Karl didn’t wait a second longer before closing the distance between them, laying a kiss on John’s sweet lips, soft and slow and intimate, saying everything that he wanted to say to John over the past year.

And with his kiss, John stated that he was clearly hungry for something more. He _wanted_ Karl. In an instant, John’s hands were under Karl’s shirt, running up his back. While Karl had started out slow, John’s kiss was deeper, hungrier. He kissed Karl with a passion and intensity that Karl hadn’t felt in a very long time, slipping his tongue into Karl’s mouth and letting it run wild. John gripped at him tightly and desperately, clutching and clawing at Karl’s back.

He tried to keep up with John’s fury, but then John started kissing his neck, and Karl had to bite his lip to keep from crying out. The warmth of John’s breath seemed to make the entire rest of the world melt away. Karl returned the favor by grabbing John’s ass, giving that bubble butt a squeeze.

John gasped sharply, and then immediately shoved his tongue in Karl’s mouth again. John’s desperate hands pulled Karl closer and tighter. Karl’s hands found the hem of John’s shirt and snaked under it, tenderly caressing his chest. And when he started tracing gentle circles with his fingertips on John’s nipple, John started to moan, and Karl couldn’t help but smile. He still had it. He could feel John start to get hard against him. Or maybe that was him. At this point, his body was so on fire that he couldn’t really tell.

He pulled away, leaving them both breathing heavily, still desperate for more. They rested their foreheads together, and they held each other close around the waist. They didn’t speak for a moment, just taking in the sound of each other’s breathing before John broke it with a whisper.

“Karl,” he breathed. “I don’t ever want to be without you again.”

“John, I—”

John shushed him gently. “I don’t want to talk about that right now.” He looked into Karl’s eyes, just inches away from his own. “Stay with me. Please.”

A beat passed, and Karl’s heart pounded. “Stay?”

“At least for the rest of the playoffs,” John said. “I don’t want to do this without you. It doesn’t feel right. I want you by my side for all of this. You’re the only person I want to go through this with.”

Karl had to use his remaining willpower to restrain himself from jumping John’s bones right there on the spot. “You make a compelling case, John Carlson. But where will I stay? Should I extend my stay at my hotel?”

“No, you fucking idiot, you’re staying with me.” John grinned. “Specifically, in my bed.”

Karl raised an eyebrow suggestively. “Oh?”

“Yes, because that’s what boyfriends do, dummy.” John planted a deep kiss on Karl’s lips. “And speaking of which, we are headed there right damn now. I am going to fuck you so silly you’ll forget you were ever a Hab.”

Karl felt himself get rock hard as John took him by the hand and lead him into his bedroom, reunited after what felt like forever, and coming together to start the rest of their lives.

* * *

And when John hoisted that silver Cup above his head, Karl was watching from his seat in the arena, his heart filled with nothing but pride and joy.

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to say hi on tumblr! You can find me at daddyoshie, and my hockey main is andrebearakovsky.


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